Monday, June 25, 2007

Broadband Doctor

This letter is to a certain person who, while at a community function, asked me why I was becoming a doctor. Enjoy:

To Mr. Hair-Plug Extraordinaire,

I find it interesting that you feel a career in the medical field is worthless. Simply because you think medicine is bogus and most doctors don’t know shit. Your love for the herbal remedies and accupuncturist you regularly see amaze me. Maybe you think that being all cool with WOO is the way to go. Maybe you’re a dumb ass.

The fact that you told me about the time you diagnosed yourself with some rare blood disease (which you weren’t even pronouncing correctly - it’s von Willebrand’s disease, not von Winter brand like Wintergreen - it's not gum) after using your high speed internet connection made me feel all warm inside - like I was going to hurl. Oh, by the way, just so you realize how silly you appeared - VWD is NOT a rare disease - it’s one of the most common coagulation disorders out there. And you did not have the disease. Getting bruised while doing manual labor does not a platelet deficiency make.

Perhaps you hold some feeling that you are special. I could sense the narcissism rising during our conversation as you elaborated on the countless ways in which you’re smarter than everyone at the “function” and that all of your doctors have gone away learning from you. You’ve told docs how to treat you and have always been correct. Sure. Whatever.

Maybe it was your own insecurity rising as my eyes could not resist looking at your new hair plugs over and over. God, where did you get those things? I guess with your vast knowledge you probably did the procedure yourself.

Whatever the reason you need to clearly get some help. You’re an asshole. A 40 year old bastard that no one likes. Because I was watching my kids play and was around you does not mean that I was interested in your life choices and feelings. You, my friend, are the reason that I decided against primary care medicine. You’re wrong, plain and simple. Unfortunately you're probably too stupid to know any better.

Regards,
-MSG

7 comments:

Old MD Girl said...

MSG, The guy sounds like he must have been annoying, though your rant is a little out of context making you sound perhaps a wee bit more harsh / arrogant than you meant...... Maybe revise a just a tad?

It is frustrating when people rant about how stupid doctors are..... to ME, a future doctor. I think many of them have been condescended to a lot. I know *I* hate being condescended to. Or maybe they just have an innate distrust of things they don't understand. With perhaps a touch of Narcissistic Personality Disorder on top of it all!

The Girl said...

A lot of doctors that I know avoid admitting to their profession in social situations because of twats like that.

Why is it always people who actually know so very little who are the surest about their own knowledge and the most cynical about other people's?

MedStudentGod (MSG) said...

Yes, a little harsh and some revision has been done. But, this guy was such a tool. I couldn't believe he was telling me the stuff he was.

For the record I did not go about telling people what I am studying. He saw my car several times in the parking lot of my apartment and noticed the a)white coat b)medical books c)ID tag that stated "medical student".

pinkie said...

Actually, I didn't think it was harsh at all, as the same thoughts would have gone through my mind as well. There are a lot of people out there who try to feel better about themselves by demeaning others. And it's that type of people I have the least amount of patience with.

Anonymous said...

There seems to be a lot of that lunacy going around. I worked for a chiropractor who sounded a lot like the guy you were talking to.

He would go on daily rants against doctors, modern medicine, the evil pharmaceutical companies etc etc. He was a sucker for conspriracy theories, urban legends, and junk science that could be easily debunked with common sense. Its interesting how the people who baked their brains back in the 60's think we should listen to them.

Julie

Lynn Price said...

Damn. It's idiots like this that give alternative medicine a reeally bad name. Foregoing medical care?? Insane. Utterly insane. No, MSG, your letter didn't strike me at all harsh. And I practice some forms of alternative medicine.

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