I’m writing this on 4 beers, so it may be a bit absurd, but what the hell!
I feel sorry for some of my peers who are alone in all of this. I’ve been able to deal with the complexities of medical training with a family who brings me strength and diligence while others have no one (relatively) for whom they’re responsible.
There’s nothing like the knowledge that someone other than yourself counts on your continuous determination, abilities to accept ridiculous situations, and the learned response of holding one’s tongue while being chastised for an unforeseen circumstance to keep you on the path towards the MD. I think without those faces I hope to see at the end of my days I might have said “fuck it” a few times. But then again, perhaps not.
What I’m trying to say, in the same alcohol-fueled way someone who’s had one too many tries to be eloquent while making a point, is that being married during these 4 years has been hard, terrible at times, but overall the most wonderful damn thing I’ve ever done.
If I’m nothing at all, besides a husband and father, then I’ve succeeded in life. I’ve felt for some time now that the greatest failure one can be is to fail as a partner and parent while the greatest accomplishment is to be a wonderful family man. It was for this reason that I left surgery and decided, once and for all, that Anesthesia would be the best fit for me.
Some people think that I’ve given up on a dream, but I think I’ve realized it already and have just made sure to always be there for it.